This insight came when I was trying to break the 2 minute mark. What I had noticed was that I would take the in-breath without even noticing it, and although it was blissful and I benefited from the breathing, I started to get frustrated. I wanted to get to that 2:30 time. I started to focus on the time, pushing myself to get to it. I was directing my energy towards the time, and not being in the moment. I lost the experience, and wasted my energy.
It made me think of a reading from the book the "Zen Mind, Beginners Mind" “But as long as you think, "I am doing this," or "I have to do this," or "I must attain something special," you are actually not doing anything... when you do not try to do anything special, then you do something. When there is no gaining idea in what you do, then you do something.” ― Shunryu Suzuki, Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind: Informal Talks on Zen Meditation and Practice This is the problem, when I bring my effort or trying into it, I actually ruin the experience. So much of this book speaks of this: “Our effort in our practice should be directed from achievement to non-achievement.” or “If you think you will get something from practicing zazen, already you are involved in impure practice.” So just practice, without adding anything to it. The addition only weighs down the experience. This is the key to peace and serenity.
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I have been doing Wim Hoff Breathing now for about a year on and off. Most recently, I have begun to work with the space of stillness that comes during the breath hold as there is a great deal of knowing and insight that comes through the stillness.
For those of you who have never done Wim Hoff breathing, the process is a bit like this. You breathe heavily (focusing on the inhale) for 40 breaths, and then exhale and hold for 1, 2 and even 3 minutes or more. If you listen to Wim himself, he has a very encouraging voice to guide you through. Here is the first recording I used, and I even go back to it when I have less time. https://youtu.be/tybOi4hjZFQ Insights have actually come from the very beginning of the process, as I worked with stilling my mind. At first, every time I came to the breath hold, I would feel this tremendous wave of fear. I felt the compulsion to get up and see what was going on. I always thought someone was at the door, or coming into the house. It was weird. As I let the feeling pass, it got less and less, and eventually went away. After this, I started to experience other "mental bad habits". I would worry about am I doing it right, or what are others thinking. All of this blocked me from being in that state of pure being. These habits of mind were basically ruining the peace of my life experience. What I have come to believe, is that during the stillness I am able to clearly see my mind in action, and have enough distance to separate myself from it. This is not unlike the goals in most meditative practices where you seek to dis-identify from the ego, or form, and learn to just be, present with self, or the I AM presence. Because these insights have felt so powerful, I have decided to start sharing them here as blog posts. This first one, is: Discipline Is Its Own Reward. Personally, I am a rather undisciplined person. I tend to follow my impulses. I tend to hesitate and lay around, and look at what I need to do rather than to do it. I tend to hit the snooze button, or not set the alarm at all. The insight from this session of Wim Hoff was so clear that it has started the type of routine that someone like me can follow. It is simply "4-7". What this represents is a block of time I commit to getting lingering projects finished. It can be AM or PM, depending on my schedule. All those little lingering things. Instead of walking by the clutter, I pick it up for 10 minutes. For those three hours I am actively working on completing things. So far it seems to be working. I am seeing the rewards. So give it a try. Maybe your discipline routine will be different. Maybe you just start meditating, or going to the gym every day. Or maybe you even start doing Wim Hoff breathing every day. The rewards it bring will be worth the effort. I have been attending a course through the Transformative Learning Foundation led by Ba and Josette Luvmour. It has sparked several new trains of thought within me, and has opened me up to a different way of being with those around me. It is almost like I am just now becoming aware of the person in a true sense, connecting intentionally to their field of consciousness energy. I can only explain it as a deepening of my awareness of the other. The course itself is on Natural Learning Relationships, a curricular model of education based in large part on attending to the emerging consciousness of children.
From our readings: Consciousness of the Developing Child Is the Future of Humanity On the Nature of Consciousness Consciousness is that which knows—(the knowing faculty) A developmental stage is a Field of Knowing The Field of Knowing—a knowledge domain A knowledge domain—the region in which the child’s consciousness accesses specific capacities and capabilities Like Buddhist meditation, states of consciousness transform through fields of knowing (similar to Bardo states) in mutual dependence upon content and context. Consciousness is primarily evidenced in changes in perception, which determines behavior, identity construction, ego development, relationship, knowledge formation, and emotional connection (Gebser, 1984). Child development is the emergence of different fields of knowing from birth through age 23 (Luvmour & Luvmour, 2006). It has been a fascinating course to participate in, and each week we begin with an exercise exploring our own consciousness. As we started this week with examining the consciousness phase of Reasonable Being, we engaged in an exercise to place ourselves within time. The exercise was designed to create a feeling of the expansiveness of time. We got comfortable and closed our eyes and then were asked to think of what we might consider a "long" time. I may have messed up the exercise a bit since my first amount of time I thought of was the infinite expanse of eternity. So as our instructor asked us to keep doubling that amount and tripling it, all I could come up with is that time doesn't even exist, or it is an echo of some sort. It was quite interesting. At the end we were asked two questions. First, "In this framework of time, what is the most important thing?" Almost everyone came up with Love, and Self in various forms. The second question was, "In this framework of time, what is the purpose of it all?" There were many more variations here. Family, Unity, Connection. Mine was to eliminate the illusion of separateness. So those all seemed connected. But there was one person who said, there is no meaning or purpose. I had a hard time with that response because I believe this is the core of the problems we face. When we cannot find our purpose or meaning, then nothing we do matters. But we matter. What we think and do matters. What we are experiencing here on Earth is the product of all of our choices. We have a choice now as to what direction we will go and where we will end up. This is a critical choice in this moment as we are facing new nanotechnology that will create physical immortality, and a prison for our spiritual being. This is the choice between humanity and something pseudo-human. One of my first courses in graduate school was neuroimmunology. Our consciousness can help direct our immune system, it was designed that way. But can our consciousness direct nanotech? It was not designed to do so. We have hardly scratched the surface of the potential of human consciousness and we would choose to destroy that potential by clogging it up with microscopic robots? I hope not. I have been listening to Lars Muhl and his wisdom teachings from the perspective of the Essenes. Please check him out for inspiration https://youtu.be/CVUAeVn3NqI He gives wisdom and practical knowledge on how to work with our higher cognitive faculties to help us live more heart centered lives and light with our true purpose. In his book "The Gate of Light", he speaks about the difference between brain intelligence and heart intelligence. "In the Western world we are led to believe that the highest level a person can aspire to is the intellectual, the mental. We try to solve all mankind's problems through methodical, pragmatic thinking. But we are forced to admit, time and again, that this way of thinking only produces more problems than we had in the first place. "Not before we admit that it is only through the intelligence of the heart that we can seriously widen our horizons and deepen our insights will mankind move toward brighter times. "The intelligence of the heart works on a completely different frequency from that of the brain. Whereas the intelligence of the brain is connected to the electrical system of the body, the intelligence of the heart connects with the Heavenly Essence and the Plane of Unity, God." This is a beautiful description of how desire and emotions play such a powerful role in creation. These are the source of our connection to the Quantum Consciousness Field. Lars Muhl rightly points out that the Essenes model of reality very much aligns with that of those now studying the quantum nature of reality and the way consciousness participates in this. The point is that we are not passive observers of our lives and the world around us. We are active co-creators of our own reality. Until we start to make those choices that will lead us towards a more beautiful life, that much longer will we prolong our own suffering. So pick up the pieces of your life, let go of the limiting habits of thought and feeling, and help to co-create the world of tomorrow, today. I have attended so many workshops on healing and spiritual practices and those that are often most attended are ones devoted to increasing prosperity and abundance. I received a handout at one that included 31 affirmations for prosperity. It somewhat surprised me that the affirmations weren't all about having positive thoughts around money, most of them related to tuning into my purpose, living my truth, and following my path.
For example, "My energy is focused and directed toward my goals." Or, "I find my life's work by looking within rather than without." There are a few also, trying to remove some of the blocks or emotional pitfalls that block me from trusting my path. "I send love to my fears and hold them up to the light of my soul." "I let go easily, trusting that nothing leaves my life unless something better is coming." I am trying to remain in this state of faith and trust as I am participating in the emergence of this vision with much trepidation. Even though I am constantly working on my inner-thought life, and lately in particular have been focused on fearing nothing, it is very difficult to believe the vision at times when I am not seeing it in front of me. What I know to be true is that starting from the beginning takes time. All of these learning experiences are here to help me grow and evolve. People show up when they are needed, and all of the help needed always arrives just on time. So, if you are wanting more abundance in your life, don't be afraid of taking that step, no matter how small, towards your hearts desire. Each journey begins with a tiny step. Every step, no matter how wobbly is part of the learning process, and is moving you towards something greater. Living your best life is what you were meant to do. Opening up to this, creates a flow of divine presence. Most importantly, Don't Fear Failure! From the book by Robert A. Russell "The Way of Mastery." "Failure isn't even remotely possible...why? If you plant a garden and the seed does not turn into a beautiful flower but withers and dies, that experience is a creation and you have done it, and because all events in space and time, everything you experience are completely neutral, there is no failure. The only failure seems to occur within your own consciousness. When you believe it is not acceptable to receive and own and embrace your creation with love and with innocence. Instead you can choose to look upon it and to experience it, and recognize your perfect safety in doing so. For it is from there that you can decide whether to continue in that form of creation, or whether to think differently and approach things differently." When I let myself view all of the forms of the creation of this project as beautiful in their own way, I let go of the fear. I can create from love, instead of trying to manipulate outcome out of fear. I can enjoy the process. I can connect to God's vision of my life and feel the flow of abundance. It is amazing what we have access to in today's digital world. A few years back I signed up for the PA (Parapsychological Association) newsletter, and I have watched as their conventions went from physical to virtual. This latest offer I couldn't resist. Anthony Peake was speaking on the topic of Egregores.
This is not unlike what Napoleon Hill was referring to as Cosmic Habit Force, or what Rupert Sheldrake calls the Morphic Field. There is an energetic that serves as a powerful force repeating habits and patterns. The Egregore is special in that it seems to have something of a personality. So I signed up. It was a mere 25$ and worth ten times the price. One of the women spoke about how people's OBE *out of body experiences, or astral travel, is starting to involve more VR reality. Another spoke on the connection between UFOs and owls. And another spoke on the Way of the Wyrd. So cool! At the end we got to have round table discussions. It was so inspiring to hear people speak about using our awareness of the metaphysical to help address some of the intractable problems we are facing today. I have always felt that any solution to our issues in all the major institutions would necessitate a spiritual aspect. The very practical element of Anthony Peake's talk was to be consciously aware of the energies behind the formation of any endeavor, or institution. That gave me pause to consider what the energies have been around the creation of the Community House. First and foremost, it was a response to the issues I saw in my neighborhood, but also in response to the failings of the major institutions of education. The intention was to break the mold and show that we CAN DO things differently. The intention was, and still is, to hold space for people to share their gifts. The intention is to be collaborative and cooperative. The intention is to be welcoming, and to create avenues for people to meet in loving community. Now that I say the intention, is the enactment of this vision unfolding as I would hope? For one thing, I can say there have been some false starts. I am naïve, as green as they come, and I am at times grasping at straws. I have had to pull back from more than one attempt to push forward into the vision before things were ready, but what is the energy this creates? One of flexibility? One of indecision? One of responsiveness? One of letting go of that which does not serve? One of perseverance? One of willingness to grow and make mistakes? Given my understanding of how these energies create the foundation of an organization and tend to be repeated, it is important to be aware of what the energy behind the enterprise really is. I was feeling rather unmotivated this morning, and when I get in this state of mind I find myself seeking inspiration. I started watching a Napoleon Hill original recording on Cosmic Habit Force. He had such a way with words, I must say. He goes over so much information in this short lecture my notes started going off the page. So I decided to look up some of the concepts he mentioned and came across his approach to strengthening goals through the Master Mind group.
I have written before on the Power of 8, a group visioning process developed by Lynne McTaggert designed to help with healing. This has been a dream of mine to create such a group. So, I was excited to happen upon Napoleon Hill's Master Mind group, in which a group of people would help energize each others goals. Check out the blog link here. This felt particularly relevant this month as we are working together to remove blocks and develop habits of envisioning our own success. The power of the group cannot be estimated. So find a supportive group to help you achieve health and wealth through learning to envision what you want instead of what you don't want. Join us tonight as we share in some practices to Remove Blocks and Envision Success. Bring your goals so we can energize them together. Abigail Larrison is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting. Topic: Removing Blocks_H2Bcr3@tiv32 Time: Apr 12, 2022 05:00 PM Central Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/85622335801?pwd=MjlaWHUyRHd0V2F5Qnhkd09aMWJ4Zz09 Meeting ID: 856 2233 5801 Passcode: 159588 One tap mobile +13126266799,,85622335801#,,,,*159588# US (Chicago) +16468769923,,85622335801#,,,,*159588# US (New York) Dial by your location +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago) +1 646 876 9923 US (New York) +1 301 715 8592 US (Washington DC) +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose) +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma) +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston) +1 408 638 0968 US (San Jose) Meeting ID: 856 2233 5801 Passcode: 159588 Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kZByFkT2O There are some spiritual practices, that when moving an idea into action, during those early phases, it is said not to speak to anyone about it. For myself, when I get an inspired idea, I always want to share it. Inspired ideas just feel good.
So why do we have to keep them to ourselves? Mainly because most people naturally inject doubt or discouragement. This can be done for a number of reasons. For one, many people live a fear-based life, one in which risks are rare, and the right action is always the safe one. Creative endeavors usually mean breaking off the beaten path, and stepping out on our own. They can be risky, so our friends and loved ones who discourage us really think they have our best interests at heart. However this discouragement can sap our energy and drain the enthusiasm out of our projects. Another trap is jealousy. We live in a competitive society. People are vying for success, and in many people's minds it is a zero sum game, that is if you win, someone else has to lose. So if you are successful, I am in turn, unsuccessful. This is a false belief that has to be smashed in all of us. We have to start living in a cooperative society where we lift each other up and support each others' success. This next session we will focus on learning how to create those positive images of our own success, but more importantly, in positively energizing and supporting our peers and neighbors in their own success. We will learn how to encourage in a healthy way, and how to eliminate jealousy and replace it with loving support and enthusiasm for the success of others. Please join us Tuesday April 12th for this second session in our How 2B Cr3@t1v3 mini-course focused on removing blocks so that we can successfully fulfill our creative goals. I was listening to a podcast the other day talking about achieving our goals, and what blocks us. One idea that spoke volumes to me, was the concept of The Energy of Incompletion. This, the speaker explained, was the drag on our energy that unfinished projects carry. They weigh on us and paralyze us, making it impossible to move forward.
I looked at my list of hundreds of projects that were in the works. I tripped over the toilet that was waiting for it's wax ring. I peered across the table at the lightbulb that I had been intending to replace for weeks now. Uugh, no wonder I am feeling overwhelmed and paralyzed. I need to get unstuck! Luckily I have several tools in my spiritual toolbox. So let's do some spring cleaning and clear away the blocks so these projects can get done. What are you wanting to achieve? What have you been putting off that you desire to create? What projects are you wanting to bring to completion? This month we will host a series of energy techniques designed to help clear the blocks to achieving success. Emotional blocks, limiting beliefs, and subconscious fears are very real barriers to our abilities to achieve our goals. Sessions will be held online from 5PM to 6PM Bring your project goals, and or be prepared to write the together with us. Join us online, or in person at the Community House, 2223 N. Sheridan Rd. Abigail Larrison is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting. Topic: Removing Blocks to Success Time: Apr 5, 2022 05:00 PM Central Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88630257867?pwd=L2FVTkJrODd5dlcyRFUxUVYxTmk0Zz09 Meeting ID: 886 3025 7867 Passcode: 885385 One tap mobile +13126266799,,88630257867#,,,,*885385# US (Chicago) +16468769923,,88630257867#,,,,*885385# US (New York) Dial by your location +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago) +1 646 876 9923 US (New York) +1 301 715 8592 US (Washington DC) +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston) +1 408 638 0968 US (San Jose) +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose) +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma) Meeting ID: 886 3025 7867 Passcode: 885385 Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/keCEfFbACJ For our full moon session, we took the opportunity to examine our hearts desires, how those desires reflected our values. Finally, we looked at our goals, focusing on a challenging goals that seemed blocked. We examined how this goal and actions were in alignment with our values.
My personal experience bumped up against one area of the Community House project that has been particularly stubborn in its emergence has been the First Apprentice program. The session gave me new insights and created a breakthrough in my thinking. I am now moving forward with the project in a new way, one that is in integrity with the entire approach of the Community House project--one of emergence, and co-creation. You can see our progress here. Perhaps the questions shared by Carissa can help you with your stubborn blocks as well. The first question asked to consider what I desired in my life, to tune into desire, I used attraction. So ask yourself... Question 1. What Are My Desires? What am I drawn towards, what pulls me in, what am I attracted to? These can be real or imagined. It could be a loving relationship, a fancy house, a successful career, lots of money, a passport full of stamps. It could be an aspect of someone's personality. If you get stuck. You can try asking yourself any of these questions: Are there any achievements that you wish you’ve attained? What? Anyone you look up too? Why? Anyone you're jealous of? Why? Remember, no judging yourself, don’t worry if it seems shallow or egotistical etc, no right or wrong answers Question 2. Now Go Deeper Ask Yourself: If you had that which you are drawn to or desire, what would that mean? What would that look like? What would your life look like? What would you get out of this? Question 3. Next Layer Down If you got all those "results" what would that mean? What would that look like? These questions are meant to connect you to the things you value. Look for the themes, for example, I identified Freedom, Fulfillment, and Flexibility. I would underline those words. I’m also scanning and taking a mental note of any patterns and and any priorities emerging. I've identified being with loved ones and meaningful experiences. FInal Question and Goal Challenge Ok, so lets take a minute and briefly write down a life goal that you currently have, big or little. A goal that just won’t seem to budge, no matter how hard you try, you just can’t seem to make progress with this goal. Below the goal you've written down, write out the list of the words you've underlined from the previous journal question along with any themes you identified. For example: Freedom, Fulfillment, Flexibility, Being with loved ones and Meaningful experiences Are these goals in alignment with your values? With what lights you up? Ask yourself: -If they are in alignment, has there been any areas where you might have thwarted the progression of this goal? And if you are sabotaging that goal what can you do differently? If you are not sabotaging that goal is there another way to get these values and desires in your life fulfilled? Is there another way? What is it? -If they are not in alignment then what are some goals that you’d like to set right now that incorporate the desires you’ve identified today? I hope you will join us for our next new moon session with Susan Worrell. I am looking forward to more insights and breakthroughs with you. Living a life in alignment with my values means living my best life. This is the type of work that makes all the difference. So join us in learning to live your best life. One of the elements of our session this month is right speech. Am I saying what I need to say? Am I in integrity in my speech? This resonated for me throughout this past week, and perhaps it will for you as you pick up this practice of becoming aware of how your speech aligns with your intentions and values. Here are the questions from last weeks session. Please enjoy the practice of becoming aware of speech. Contemplate each and then journal. Do this with a friend and share your insights for a deeper experience. Question 1. What do I WANT to say when someone asks me how I’m doing/what’s new/etc.? -What do I ACTUALLY say when someone asks me how I’m doing/what’s new/etc? *Are there any patterns? Are there any patterns with a particular person or a specific type of person? Question 2. How do I feel WHILE I'm interacting with others? Physically, Spiritually, Emotionally Are you fully engaged and hanging on their every word or are you checked out? Is your mind racing with thoughts? Are there any common themes about where your mind and thoughts go? Are there particular people you tend to “check out” with or be more present with? How do I feel AFTER I've interacted with others? Physically, Spiritually, Emotionally What are the a patterns here? Question 3. What topics are generally discussed when I’m interacting with others? Is there a theme in conversation? What do I really want to talk about versus what I am talking about? Consider the form of the conversation. Question 4. Where might you be engaging in ways that are out of integrity. What are your recurring patterns -Not voicing opinions/not letting others voice their opinions -Interrupting/being interrupted -Saying things you don't mean and/or white lies -Saying yes when you want to say no -Saying no when you want to say yes - Being intimidated/Intimidating others -Apologizing when not necessary -Not setting boundaries/violating others boundaries -Name-calling/bulling -Raising your voice -Shutting down/stonewalling -Closed off body language -“Punishing” others indirectly instead of verbally addressing a problem/concern -Expecting others to read your mind -Laughing at jokes you don't understand -Accepting responsibility for mistakes that are not your own -Accepting praise or credit for for someone else's “work” or full credit for a collaboration Our final exercise led by Carissa was to examine a situation, starting with just one, in which you have been out of integrity in your speech and consider how to become in greater alignment with what you truly want and believe. In choosing the situation consider one in which you have a difficult time being your most authentic self. Now, imagine yourself being in full integrity the next time you interact with the person. What would that look like? What would that feel like? Allow yourself to experience this before you have the next interaction, and see if anything changes. Finally, create an authenticity related mantra or self affirming statement. |
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