One of the elements of our session this month is right speech. Am I saying what I need to say? Am I in integrity in my speech?
This resonated for me throughout this past week, and perhaps it will for you as you pick up this practice of becoming aware of how your speech aligns with your intentions and values.
Here are the questions from last weeks session. Please enjoy the practice of becoming aware of speech.
Contemplate each and then journal. Do this with a friend and share your insights for a deeper experience.
What do I WANT to say when someone asks me how I’m doing/what’s new/etc.?
-What do I ACTUALLY say when someone asks me how I’m doing/what’s new/etc?
*Are there any patterns? Are there any patterns with a particular person or a specific type of person?
How do I feel WHILE I'm interacting with others? Physically, Spiritually, Emotionally
Are you fully engaged and hanging on their every word or are you checked out? Is your mind racing with thoughts? Are there any common themes about where your mind and thoughts go? Are there particular people you tend to “check out” with or be more present with?
How do I feel AFTER I've interacted with others? Physically, Spiritually, Emotionally
What are the a patterns here?
What topics are generally discussed when I’m interacting with others? Is there a theme in conversation? What do I really want to talk about versus what I am talking about?
Consider the form of the conversation.
Where might you be engaging in ways that are out of integrity. What are your recurring patterns
-Not voicing opinions/not letting others voice their opinions
-Saying things you don't mean and/or white lies
-Saying yes when you want to say no
-Saying no when you want to say yes
- Being intimidated/Intimidating others
-Apologizing when not necessary
-Not setting boundaries/violating others boundaries
-Raising your voice
-Closed off body language
-“Punishing” others indirectly instead of verbally addressing a problem/concern
-Expecting others to read your mind
-Laughing at jokes you don't understand
-Accepting responsibility for mistakes that are not your own
-Accepting praise or credit for for someone else's “work” or full credit for a collaboration
Our final exercise led by Carissa was to examine a situation, starting with just one, in which you have been out of integrity in your speech and consider how to become in greater alignment with what you truly want and believe.
In choosing the situation consider one in which you have a difficult time being your most authentic self. Now, imagine yourself being in full integrity the next time you interact with the person. What would that look like? What would that feel like? Allow yourself to experience this before you have the next interaction, and see if anything changes.
Finally, create an authenticity related mantra or self affirming statement.